Last weekend I was in my youngest daughter’s kitchen, nibbling some appetizers in anticipation of the real meal that was on its way. My granddaughter, Allison, age six, came in carrying a tall clear plastic “jar” with a brushed silver lid. Inside were three small pieces of torn paper, each dated and bearing an image she had drawn.
I asked her what the jar was for. She said it was her “Missing Jar.” Allison is adopted. Jody and John went to Russia and brought her home when she was eleven months old. She is a bright and loving spirit, very funny, too. She has attached and adjusted well. Recently, she expressed interest in her birth mother and subsequently said she missed her.
At that point, Jody did something that stuns me. She bought the jar at IKEA and gave it to Allison. She suggested Allison draw or write something down each time she missed her birth mother. Thus, the three pieces of paper in the jar.
No shame. No guilt. No pretending what is, isn’t. Instead, she chose a belief in love and a trust that what comes can be managed.
Are you missing someone or something? Maybe a jar would help.
Thank you, Jody.
In your corner,
The ludicrous question, or Ludi-Q, in a situation like this would be “Will you pretend that what is, isn’t?” Ludi-Q’s help you become Ludi-Literate. Click here to hear more.
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